What kind of lover are you?

February, the month of love is upon us!

I have read a number of articles on the subject lately and inevitability it left me looking at my own concept of love.

Anyone who knows me can tell you that I simply love ‘love’! Not only the magic of falling in love (which in itself is the best natural drug on this planet!) but to actively love someone – well, I just can’t get enough of it!

Unfortunately, this is not the case for every one. There are, in my view, 5 different kinds of lovers in this world:

You get the hippies
My kind, the die-hard romatics who see love and beauty in every day. They love the magic of caring for someone. The beauty of baring your soul and innermost feelings and thoughts to someone – without the fear of judgment. The sense of belonging. The knowing that you have a safe harbor to turn to.

You get the wanna-be’s
Those that desperately want to love, but simply can’t. They have been too hurt and damaged by the junkies and the users to be able to love. They are caught in a battle within themselves. Their hearts that want to love, yearn for it, desperately want to reach out to it. Their minds however, tell them to stop, to back off, to guard and protect at all cost the heart from being broken again.

You get the junkies
We all have met someone like this. These people jump from relationship to relationship like a butterfly flirts from flower to flower. They love the rush of the chase. The thrill of the catch is what grabs them. However, once they have made the kill and have their new partner hook, line and sinker, they loose interest and move on to the next one.

You get the users
These are by far the most dangerous kind! They will love you, strictly on their terms and strictly as long as your love serves their purpose. They will love you enough to make you want to stay around, but not enough to upset their carefully balanced apple cart. They will love only as long as the love they receive does not require them to move outside of their comfort zone. Run, run as fast as your legs can carry you. Do not get caught in their beautifully constructed lies!

Lastly you get the lost ones
These are the ones I pity most. They have been through the wanna be’s, the users and the junkies. They might even have had their own hippie, but for some reason that didn’t work either. So, they are left feeling that love, true love, does not exist. They have given up on it entirely. More often than not they turn into hard, cynical, bitter human beings. In some cases, I’ll admit, they give up on love completely, yet are content with their own company, but again this is the minority.

There is no better time than now, February, the month of love, to examine not only your relationship but yourself too.

Get rid of denial and answer yourself: what kind of lover are you and what is it doing to your partner?

Go forth and love like a hippie, love like there is no tomorrow.

All we need is love, tra-la-la-la-la!

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